How to Ask For Feedback on Job Rejection

As one of the many women I've interviewed over the last several months, I've found that one of the hardest questions to answer as a woman is how to ask for feedback on job rejection. There's nothing more hurtful and unprofessional than an interview where you're asked this question, "What was wrong? "followed immediately by "Thank you for your time, but we just can't hire you right now." Although women certainly have access to the Internet, many don't know how to ask for feedback on job rejection because they don't know how to approach it. Unfortunately, asking why you didn't get the job is not an easy question to answer given the dearth of responses from successful women (and a surprising number of men) who have been in this situation.

The key to responding to an interview question like "Why did you get the job" is respect and brevity. If you address the person openly and honestly and explain that you were not hired based solely on their feedback, it will make them feel listened to and appreciated. If you don't address them by name but instead address them by their title, it makes them feel like you don't respect them enough to take their request seriously-a awful feeling indeed if you're hoping to get future applications from this person. If possible, ask the interviewer why you were not hired. Even if they don't say it was your fault, you will know that they remember you after the interview and will be looking at your future applications with a critical eye. Once you address the why rather than just the what, you will likely get better responses and a better chance of getting future job offers.

Another important thing to remember is that an interviewer will not always appreciate a follow-up phone call or e-mails in the days immediately following an interview. Most often, the interviewer will let the candidate know that they were not contacted immediately, and the feedback would be coming in later in the day. You can still give them some attention by sending them a thank-you note the next day, but you should avoid pushing a product or service yourself. The more you focus on providing useful information, the more the recruiter will trust you and may even include you in future job searches.

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